Parents Share The Funniest Reason They Had To Come Collect Their Kid From School
It is but obvious for kids to play silly pranks, sometimes on their friends, other times on their parents or siblings and yet others on their teachers too; and come on, if not them, then who? It is acceptable for a kid to do that given their age and innocence. After you reach a particular age, people are more likely to take offence to pranks pulled on them. You will be countered with statements like “Hello, you are not a kid anymore, so kindly do not behave like one!’ or “You are an adult, it would be great if you act like one!” Well folks, we don’t really mind our friends and peers pulling our leg from time to time because who doesn’t need a good laugh every once in a while…
Now, if you are a parent or guardian yourself, you would probably agree with us on the following – one of the most dreadful situations to be in is getting a phone call from your kid’s school to come pick her/him from school. This phone call is very much capable of giving you the worst of chills. You get worried for your child as much as you dread that meeting with the principal! But folks, there are times when your kid just pulled an innocent prank which the teacher with no sense of humor did not like and hence the phone call!!!
Read on to find out more for yourself…
Dangerous Game Alert
“I got a phone call earlier this year from the school nurse, saying she was concerned because my son had passed out while in the lunch line. I went to pick him up and he seemed a little dazed, but ok. My kid couldn’t remember anything about what happened beforehand, so I made an appointment with his pediatrician for an hour later.
Right as we were getting ready to leave, he sheepishly said “mom, I just remembered that right before I passed out, we were playing a game to see who could turn their face the reddest.”
So, my kid had me thinking he had a brain tumor but no, he just held his breath until he passed out, and not a single other kid thought they should mention that to the teacher.” (echeveria_rn)
Unique Wrapping Idea
“When my daughter was in 2nd or 3rd grade, I got a call about a present she had brought to school. So, the night before, she asked to go to the store to buy some Rolos because it was her friend’s birthday. She wrapped them up, and put them in her back pack. I never saw her finish them up or I would have stopped her. She had wrapped each rolo in red paper, bundled a few together, put little black pip cleaner fuses on them, and attached a note that said “your the bomb”. The school was not amused. I thought it was very clever though. There were no repercussions thankfully.” (Larsasnor)
Puns Not Appreciated
“I made the mistake of telling my stepdaughter about the professor I had in college that we knew never read our papers so it turned into a class game to fit ridiculous sentences and bad jokes into the middle of them to see if we’d ever get caught.
She apparently decided that was an amazing thing to do and I got called for a phone conference because she turned in a history paper that was chock full of awful puns that were not appreciated.” (AbortRetryImplode)
Not Funny The Second Time
“I got a call that my son was sick and that I had to come pick him up. He was completely fine that morning. I asked the nurse, “He really can’t go back to class?” and she said, “he says he’s really sick.” Fine.
I picked him up and on the walk home I asked what was up. He said he had to fart really badly and didn’t want to do it in class. I laughed and said ok.
Two days later I get another call to pick him up. So I got him and it was for the same reason. I told him that it was funny once but that from now on, if he needed to fart in class, he should go to the bathroom lol.” (LilyKnightMcClellan)
Meeting With The Principal
“That was in elementary school, early years. The principal called us and looked at us with a stern look of disapproval while telling us our son was using bad language. I then proceeded to explain to her that my wife and I only spoke French at home and we did not have television. The only English our son had ever heard was at school, so I asked her what she was going to do about it. It was one of the shortest conversations I ever had with a principal.
Edit: thank you everybody for the lively discussion and interesting comments, I did not think it would get that much interest. It is obviously a very precious personal moment that my son and I will cherish forever. Glad you got a kick out of it 🙂
About the principal, as I recall, she suddenly remembered she had to do something urgently and the meeting was over before I could say anything else.” (TheWiseOne1234)
“In 7th grade one of my friends felt that he could handle some Dave’s insanity sauce. Several of us chipped in and $60 was on the line if he could down a capfull for 5 minutes without food/water.
I bought the bottle and showed him I had it in the middle of band practice. He swiped it from my hands he drank about 1/3 of the bottle. He immediately turned bright red and you could tell he regretted this decision. Doing his best to hold it down he went out into the hall and grabbed some water to try to alleviate the heat.
It did not work and he vomited all over the floor, and we went down to the nurses’ office. They called his father and told him to take him to the hospital to make sure he was okay. They went fishing instead.
My father was called to pick me up, and nothing ever really came of it. We let my friend have the $60.” (VerbableNouns)
Anything For A Lunchdate With Parents
“I was in an early morning college class and when I got out I realized I had missed calls, texts, and emails from my daughter’s preschool. A voicemail said she had been throwing up and to please hurry and come get her. When I got to the school the receptionist showed me to a room where my daughter was sat with a trashcan on her lap. She told me my daughter kept announcing she was throwing up and then would cough and spit into the trashcan. She had no fever and was otherwise cheerful and talkative. I signed her out, got her outside and into my car where she jumped forward and kissed my cheek and told me she missed me and where would I like to go for lunch. That kid busted herself out of preschool to finagle a lunch date with me. It worked.” (noelleptc)
Over ‘Incorrect’ Pronunciation
“My dad got sent to the principal’s office for telling his 6th grade teacher she was pronouncing the state capital of South Dakota (Pierre) wrong. She kept saying, “Pee-air” (two syllables, like the French name) and he said it was, “Peer” (one syllable, like what you fish off of). He was sent off for not respecting a teacher’s authority. My grandma had to drive to school to talk to the teacher and principal and says, “Did you ask why he says it’s “peer?” Because if you did, you’d find out that both his father and I are from South Dakota. He visits his grandparents and aunts and uncles in South Dakota every summer. He knows plenty of people from South Dakota who all say “Peer”. Do you know anyone from South Dakota? No? Well, take it from a South Dakotan. It’s “Peer”, we’re not fancy French people, and stop wasting my time.”
Edit: Thanks for the silver! You’re so kind!” (KixandTheKid)
Beating Around The Bush
“Not a parent but as a kid when I got Pokemon yellow I was so god damn into it that when we went out for lunch one day at school, I got inside this huge bush that was practically hollow inside, it was among a load of other large bushes and trees at the side of the school field and rarely ever was entered by students because we weren’t really allowed.
So I sat there for hours playing Pokemon and when I came out it was 3pm (school closed at 3.30) I had been in there since 12.30 and my mother was at the school and was freaking out because she thought they let me leave the school alone.” (Stillwindows95)
Daddy At Fault
“Not me, but my sister… She got a call from her son’s very catholic school that he needed to be picked up.
She gets to the school and the principal said that he had to ho home for the day because he peed on the tree outside at recess.
He really laid into her about how they had to bleach the tree (seriously. They poured bleach on the tree because a little kid peed on it…) and it was terrible and how she shouldn’t be teaching her son these things.
My sister looked him straight in the eye and asked, “Do you really think I have the right plumbing to have taught him that? Yell at my husband when he comes in next time!” (TDot132)
“It’s funny now, but wasn’t at the time. One day I was called to pick up my daughter from school. I asked why and was vaguely told she had been caught cheating, was being disrespectful to the teacher and had destroyed government property. “Holy s***”, I thought, “what had she done”.
My mind instantly went through scenarios in which she had cheated on a test, got caught, then my sweet little 7 year old had cursed the teacher while throwing something through a window.
I got to the school, found my scared daughter in the principal’s office looking totally dejected and asked for an explanation. I discovered the cheating was that she had giggled while playing a game where someone was “it” and the other half of the classroom had to guess who it was.
The disrespecting teacher was from her crossing her arms when she was being told how she wrecked the game.
The best was the explanation for destroying government property. During story time she was picking at loose carpet threads.
I was extremely angry with my daughter the whole drive from work, and after this load of W. T. F. it instantly transferred to anger with the school. “You called me here because she giggled, crossed her arms and picked at old nasty carpet?” I was hot and took my daughter home, letting her know I was a bit upset with her, but let her know that there would be no more punishment, she’d been through enough.
We went home and watched cartoons and I made her favorite grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch.” (corJoe)
Dexter And Nephew
“Nephew is staying with me for 2 months ,I showed him Dexter’s Laboratory for the first time, next day they call me to pick him up because he would only say omelette du Fromage to any interaction.” (Hawkov)
Unicorns Over Goats
So my daughter was in 5th grade. She was proving to be pretty responsible, so she was allowed to have a cell phone (because she was home about an hour before I was on weekdays) and an Instagram account that I heavily monitored. We never had any issues (still haven’t and she’s now in high school).
Well, I get a call from her school’s principal one day. He tells me 2 boys were fist fighting in the lunchroom. I asked what that had to do with my daughter. Well apparently my child had used an Instagram account to start what was essentially a cult called Unicorn Club. Unicorns were obviously the worshipped deity, with goats being the devil figure to the unicorn gods. These 2 boys got into a fist fight over whether unicorns or goats were better. I had to pick her up to prevent further disputes & disband Unicorn Club.” (TrashPandaWrangler)
Wrong Context and More
“Not me, but my coworker at the time. The school called her one day to come pick up her 5-year old daughter for threatening to murder the teacher.
Her daughter had gotten in trouble for talking. When the teacher put her in time out, she said “If you put me in time out, my daddy is going to come here and MURDER you!”
Turns out, my coworker lives on a farm where they butcher pigs. When it was time to butcher a pig, her dad would say “Gonna go murder a pig!” Which is where she picked it up.
When they asked her what she thought that word meant, she said “You know… murder it! They go away and you get a new one!” So, she thought she could get her daddy to come out and replace the teacher with a new teacher and that was what the word “murder” meant.” (Booner999)
Don’t Call Me Ma’am
“My family is from Alabama, and we moved to Michigan when I was really young. My parents made us call them “ma’am” and “sir” when responding to them- it may sound super strange to those on the coasts and up north but it is a normal sign of respect in the south. Anyway, my teacher was fed up with me calling her “ma’am” and thought I was being a smartass and she yelled at me in front of the class. I couldn’t help it, and I kept calling her that, and finally she called in my parents. They thought it was hilarious, but my third grade self didn’t think so!” (Gwennnn)
Daughter Lost It
“When my daughter was in pre-k, I got a call to come have a chat with main supervisor. So I roll in, grab a seat and ask ‘what’s up?’ There was another kid there that had a bad habit of scratching and biting other kids. She had done so to my daughter a time or two in the past. I told the pre-k teachers to keep an eye out for it.
Well apparently the kid decided to set her sights on my daughter again, biting her on the arm. Except this time my daughter decided she had zero f***s left to give, pulled off her shoe and beat the other mongrel about the head with it. They had to be physically separated.
I sat back and laughed, saying “mess with the bull, you’ll get the horns”. Supervisor smirked and said yes indeed.
Later that eve, I had to explain to my daughter that beating people with your shoe is not the best of ideas.
My kid rocks.” (ChappaQuitIt)
Teacher Didn’t Appreciate A Good Sense Of Humor
“My youngest was in 3rd grade at the time. The music teacher at that school had absolutely no sense of humor. My oldest daughter – who loved music and loved singing – remembered how harsh and humorless she was. At that age group, a music teacher should be less about the strict discipline and more about instilling a love for and joy of music to young children.
Anyway, I went to pick up my youngest daughter from school and the music teacher was there waiting for me, arms crossed, looking angry. As I drove up and my youngest got in, the music teacher came up to my window and motioned for me to roll down the window.
“Your daughter was disruptive in my class today!”
“OK… what did she do?”
“I was having the class clap to a song and she kept clapping on the off beats!”
“OK… did you ask her why?”
“Yes, I asked her why she was doing it and she said – ‘because it’s funny, teacher!’ – and the rest of the class laughed at me!”
… and so did I. I couldn’t help it. I laughed out loud right then and there.
Music teacher looks at me, unsmiling. Then I said: “Oh crap, guess I shouldn’t be laughing, huh.”
I had a chat with my daughter about directing her sense of humor more appropriately, like on the playground, and to please not be disruptive. Then I took her out for an ice cream.” (SouthernGirlInNH)
Teacher Got The Wrong Kid
“My parents had to come get me and talk to the principal because a boy who sat next to me stole something from me and wouldn’t give it back. Naturally, this upset me and I was crying and asking the teacher for help. I was sent to the principal’s office for disrupting class and trying to steal from my classmates.
I was in 1st grade. To hell with that teacher.” (big_yugi)
Son Snorted Coffee Beans
“I’m a physician. Got a call years ago when my then 6 year old decided to snort a coffee bean during their arts/crafts session. It was hurting him and he finally owned up to the teacher what he did.
I get to the school, there is my son sitting there looking a bit sheepish. I asked him why he did it. He replied he was told he wasn’t allowed to eat it, but he wanted it in his tummy anyways…Perhaps my spouse and I were too explicit with explaining anatomy to our children.
He had a big old bean halfway up. With some simple instrumentation it was easily removed.
My boy, who is now a teenager, has the nickname “Bean” from this incident as most of his classmates are still in high school together.” (IamsomebodyAMA)
Sarcasm Is Not Meant or All
“One thing you should know about me right of the bat is that I don’t really get sarcasm. I don’t know why but for some reason it just goes over my head and I legitimately can’t tell sarcasm from everything else. Never have and probably never will, so if you say something to me you better mean it.
This was at a daycare. There was this one boy who kept literally pulling my pig tails, stealing my toys, and just being an over all idiot. I told the Nuns but they said to just pray for strength and forgiveness. I told my mom and she said to not rock the boat and try to ignore him which seemed unfair at the time but looking back at it I understand why she said that. It was a free daycare and we were dirt floor poor so it really did help my mom out a lot.
Latter at a family dinner I complained to my Auntie, now my Auntie is a no nonsense butch kick-em-in-the-pants type of lady. So she told me “Well, kick him nice and make him leave you alone.” apparently that was sarcasm. Guess who couldn’t tell it was sarcasm? If you guessed me then you’d be right.
The next time Jeremy pulled my pigtails I wiped around and beat his face as much as any 7 year old could.
Yeah….. Mom was pissed, Auntie thought it was hilarious, and I had to take extra classes on forgiveness and patience.” (HiraethAtRockBottom)
The Mooning Incident
“Omg I totally forgot my son mooned a few kids back when he was in 1st grade. He apparently was digging a hole by bending over and scooping sand backwards between his legs (like how a dog digs). He’s a scrawny, lanky kid, so pants that are long enough are always a bit loose around the waist. Well, his drawers must have slipped a bit and one of the girls shouted, “Pull up your pants!” And he decided to pull down his underwear and shake his bottom at them. They laughed, the teacher on recess duty was crying laughing but figured she needed to pull the maturity card and had my son go back inside to the classroom before recess was over so his classroom teacher could explain why we don’t show our bottoms in public. My son was in tears, the classroom teacher also was trying not to laugh, and I got the obligatory email saying “Your child mooned the playground. We discussed why this was a poor choice of actions and your child expressed remorse and apologized to his classmates. We felt no further disciplinary action was needed at school.”
We had parent-teacher conferences the next day. Both teachers apologized for laughing, but couldn’t help it because of all the kids at school, he was not the one they would have pegged as the playground mooner.” (KixandTheKid)
Innocent And Sneaky First Grader
“I was called in because the elementary school was going on a field that my son forgot to give me the permission slip for. He decided to give forgery a whirl. This was in first grade so the handwriting was awful. He also signed my name “Mom”.” (mulletamore)
When Daughter Shared Some Wisdom
“When my darling child was in first grade, I got a call from the school to let us know that the quiet shy kid was put on red and had to serve lunch detention. Queue up a sense of panic as usually it was her twin in trouble. We joked that this child’s native name would me Little River Runs Still but Deep. Referring to the idea that on the surface water can appear calm but the undertow will kill you.
She never complained, barely cried as a baby, and was generally the most easy going person on the planet. But piss her off enough she will strike hard and fast. Like the time as toddlers her twin was pushing her and knocking her down. She calmly walked into the kitchen with me to get her sippy cup and came back in the room, whacked her sister upside the head, and proceeded to watch cartoons. Twin had a good sized egg on her head from that.
What did she do that was so horrible? In class after the zero tolerance for bullies program, she finally got tired of one of the boys throwing things at her and talking to her constantly. She wrote a note that said, “You will die someday.” No direct threat of violence, but merely informing a first grader that he was mortal and would die at some point in the future.
The teacher laughed when she told us, but said because it was right after the program she had to punish her.” (lala_7dipiti)
Religious Discrimination Not Acceptable
“My daughter’s school called and told me that they wanted to expel my daughter for pointing at another student. The other child complained that my daughter put a spell on her. That made for an interesting phone call from the principal. BTW the expulsion never came about. Evidently if you throw the words “law suit for religious discrimination” around they seem to change their minds quickly.” (staciesstuff)
When It Is Not Your Child
“I’m not sure about funniest but definitely odd. My husband gets the call, Mr. pdxfishbowl your daughter is here sick in the office can you please come get her. No big deal. We live close and it happens to be his day off. He goes in and the secretary recognizes him and tells the little girl (6 or 7) “Hey, your Dad is here to get you”. The problem is it’s not our daughter. Not even the same age, just the same hair color. My husband tells her something along the lines of “just because she has blonde hair doesn’t mean she belongs to me”. He laughed it off and went home. I was always slightly paranoid after that. Our daughter was not sick and had not gone to the office that day. It was a small school, we have a very uncommon last name, and she wasn’t our only child attending school there. Yep, the school secretary tried to send some random sick kid home with a stranger.” (pdxfishbowl)
Don’t Kill A Child’s Curiosity
“My younger brothers both attended a nursery-kindergarten at a local Methodist church. The older one kept getting bad behavior calls and such for asking too many questions during Christian class. The one that stands out to me the most was when the teacher called for my mom to pick him up because when she was teaching the Immaculate Conception he said that it was scientifically impossible and she needed to check her facts and where did she even get that information because it’s a lie. I thought it was hilarious. They put both of them in a new school and my brother is now allowed to ask all the questions he wants!” (Traummich)
Stepson And His Epic Style
“My step son got sent home in epic style.
This was when he was in high school. Their gym class was split up each semester by PE and swimming. The problem was for some reason one day during swimming, they were told not to use the pool. Rather than just having them do PE they sat in the pool area doing nothing. They were permitted to get up and walk around though. On one of his passes around the pool he decided he wanted to stand on the diving board. When the teacher yelled at him to get down he said the following:
“You don’t own me! You can’t control me!”
He then proceeded to yell at the top of his lungs “Free Bird!!!” and jumped into the pool fully clothed. the principal was laughing when we walked in and he told us the only reason my son was getting sent home was so the teacher could save face.
Another story that didn’t involve school but instead the police.
My wife and I were out shopping when she received a call from the local police in our neighborhood. He and his friends (his brother included) were caught trespassing. Apparently what happened was he and his friends went down to this lot where the local mine company stored their heavy equipment, i.e. dump trucks, bulldozers, and bucket loaders. They decided they were going to dig trenches, build forts with trees they knocked down, as well as have races with the equipment. The cops showed up and everyone took off running. He saw that it was a K9 unit that showed up and decided he was not going to run so he was the only one who got rolled up. When we showed up at the police station he was sitting in the dispatch room with all of the officers laughing like he was just stopping by for a visit. The police said because he didn’t run they weren’t going to pursue any charges unless the mine company reported that they had damaged any of the equipment. Nothing ever came of it.” (Survivedtheapocalyps)
An Upset Stomach Upsets The Kid
“Earlier this year, got a call from school about my 7 year old son. He’s not feeling well, could I come and pick him up? Sure, it’s rare, so he must be serious. I get to the office to sign him out, he’s on the verge of tears but trying to hold it together in public. Then he kinda loses it when he blurts out to me, “I can’t stop pooping daddy!”
4 months later and I’m still not allowed to make enchiladas for supper anymore! :(“ (CheesyItalian)
Teachers Can Ride Camels Too
“I’ve got one that my grandma likes to tell. One day she got called into the principal’s office because my aunt had failed a “common sense test.” My aunt had answered yes to the question “would you see your teacher riding a camel?” Apparently this warranted calling my grandma in to ask her what she was teaching her own child. So my grandma told them, ever so politely, that my aunt had in fact seen her teachers riding camels because they had lived in Libya for a few years at the Air Force base where my Grandpa was stationed. The teacher and principal didn’t believe her and told her that she was just trying to cover for my aunt, so she had to bring in slides to show the class of my aunt living in Africa.” (HyperFrosting)
McDonald’s Burger’s Reference
“Not me, but my brother. My little brother was in Elementary school at the time. One day, some girl who always picked on him kept on calling him “Porky” over and over again. It was odd since he was a skinny kid and she was, in fact, pretty hefty herself. He started getting annoyed, so he decided to call her a “Double Quarter Pounder” as in the Cheeseburger from McDonalds. She cried and went to the principal. My dad had to go pick him up and to this day we still laugh about it.” (briebrierae96)
Blue Dye On Son’s Neck
“Not a parent but idiot son. My dad was called to pick me up because my skin (neck area) had turned blue/purplish and kept seemingly getting better and worse. Although I felt fine, a teacher noticed it, sent me to the nurse and they called my Dad who took me to the doctor. Well, the doctor was puzzled then said let me try something and wiped a wet napkin across my neck and it wiped right off… I had just gotten new blue sheets that hadn’t been washed so dye got on my deck. It was just different lighting that made it look blue/purple and better/worse.” (Dumbdumbdumdum)