“Lunatic” has nothing to do with acting crazy because you have been bitten by multiple ticks. It instead has its roots in the Latin word for moon, “Luna.” THIS IS THE NAME OF THE CAT IN SAILOR MOON, I THINK, WHICH IS NOT AS COOL AS THE CAT IN SABRINA THE TEENAGE WITCH – SALEM, I GOT YOU, BABY.
Jeans are cool and whatever and I like to wear them but the origin of the word “jeans” is so friggin’ boring. It’s just named after Genoa, Italy, their birthplace AND ALSO THE BIRTHPLACE OF A KIND OF SALAMI I’M REALLY INTO. CURED MEAT, I GOT YOU, BABY.
The word “avocado” comes from the Aztec word “ahuacatl” which means testicle. So when you’re getting your 8$ avocado on toast, YOU EATIN’ NUTS, BABY.
The word “robot” is cool and I like it a bunch but did you know that it comes from the Czech word “robota”, which means “forced labor”. Now you know for sure when robots take over the planet they are probably going to use the whole naming them slaves thing against us.
“Phony” is a word that is better when immediately preceding the word baloney. Apparently it’s British slang for fake fold rings sold BY FRIGGIN’ PIRATES.
The word “nimrod” used to mean “excellent hunter” but NUMBER ONE SARCASTIC A-HOLE Bugs Bunny used to call Elmer Fudd a nimrod as an insult the way you would call your one friend WHO IS ABSOLUTE A1 HORSE CRAP AT BASEBALL Babe Ruth.
Here is some junk I DID NOT KNOW ABOUT ASSASSINS. Apparently, an assassin is someone who kills someone of religious or political importance based on religious or political motivations. If you do it for love or to get more hot dogs, it’s just regular murdering. I DIGRESS. This is about word origins. ANYWAY, there was a Muslim sect of dudes during the Crusades who would get stoned on hash and then kill leaders on the opposing side. People started calling these hash heads “hashishiyyin” (hash smoker in Arabic) and then English dudes kept mispronouncing it to the point that it came out sounding like “assassin” years later.
The word “dunce” used to be a positive thing. It was named after this old philosophy guy named John Duns Scotus who was so influential that he had his own followers called Dunsmen (I KID YOU NOT). During the Renaissance (SHOUT OUT LEARNING ABOUT ALL KINDS OF JUNK), more modern philosophies gained prominence and anyone still into our pal Dunsy was JUSTIFIABLY RIDICULED FOR BEING A COMPLETE IDIOT AND TOTALLY NOT WITH THE TIMES.
So there’s this Irish dude who wants to make a quick buck and so he bets his friend (an idiot) that he can get a new word introduced into the English language within a couple of days. So then the dude writes the word “quiz” down on a few scraps of paper which is, at this time, complete nonsense. And then this dude gives these scraps of paper and has like a bunch of street urchins go and graffiti this thing everywhere. And then everyone is talking about it and PAPOW IT’S A NEW FRIGGIN’ WORD
The word “nightmare” is cool and it makes me think of spooky stuff AND I LIKE SPOOKY STUFF but it has nothing to do with horse BECAUSE HORSES CAN EFF THEMSELVES, ALWAYS EATING CARROTS AND ACTING LIKE THEY CAN TALK WHEN YOU GIVE THEM PEANUT BUTTER (MR. ED, THANKS BUT NO THANKS). ANYWAY, the “mare” part has nothing to do with horses and instead is referring to Germanic folklore where a mare is an evil lady goblin who sits on your chest trying to suffocate you BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT GERMAN GOBLINS DO, DUMMY!!