25 Worst Jobs in the World (Besides Working at DWADS)


Jobs are the thing you get when you need money to buy things like gummy bears or beanie babies. You do something that someone else doesn’t want to do and then they give you money for it. Sometimes these jobs are fine, but some are terrible. We think terrible jobs are funny.

Here are our top 25 picks for the world’s worst jobs:



Funny Hat Guys


These guys are troopers. They stand there for HOURS and are not allowed to interact with passers-by. Don’t be fooled by their silly costume though. These dudes are active military and their weapons are loaded. If you annoy them enough they will kill you.




Barnyard Masturbator. Yup. That’s a thing. Someone has to collect the goods and help all the animals get preggo through artificial insemination. Stop being so immature, okay guys? This is a natural thing. Don’t be ashamed about it, okay? Put it on your Tinder profile.


Dead Meat


That raccoon you killed as you were going 85 mph in a 55 zone? Some shmuck has to go now and scrape it off the road and dispose of the body. It’s a living and if we all stopped hitting animals then these guys wouldn’t have a job… so do the right thing.


Dang I Forgot My Phone in There


GROSS. I think the angle makes it look worse that it is, but I’ve totally seen (in real life) someone shove their arm up a cow’s poop shoot and they went all the way up to their shoulder.

My question is why? Whatever the reason for this, how about we just don’t do it.


Sewage Diver


Sewage diver. Sorry bro, you can keep that paycheck. No amount of money could be worth that. What are you diving for? Loose change? Why are there no machines that do that for us? EWWWWWWWWWWW


You Suck


Nothing is worse than a hot Portapotty that hasn’t been cleaned in a long time. Meet my friend Jim over here. He takes a big pipe in there and sucks up all your dung. This profession pays very well, but you’ll never get laid ever again. So make your choice.


Toe Jam


ANY job where you touch other people’s feet is a NO THANKS BUCKO from me. If your foot is broken, let it fall off. Also, don’t wear flip-flops or sandals. No one wants to see that.

Whatever this job is, I bet the suicide rate is VERY high.


Murder Scenes


So after the hunky CSI dudes and gals are done pretending to be cool and smart, someone’s gotta go in and clean the bloody mess. It’s probably gotta lead you into some dark situations and crimes scenes that are mega disturbing. I say burn down the building and build a new one.


Deep Breath


So this is a real thing. You can get a job sniffing armpits for deodorant research. Once again, showing signs of interest for this type of jobs should sound off red flags to your friends and family.

That lady looks like she’s having a good time.


Here Fishy Fishy Fishy


Dead fish collection is a real thing. If you’re a jerk you can try and pass them off as fresh fish and offer them to the locals. That way everyone can enjoy the pleasure of food poisoning. In all seriousness though, thanks a lot BP. You suck!